YOU NEEDN’T LIES TO GET LOVE

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“I had no idea that being your authentic self could make me as rich as I’ve become. If I had, I’d have done it a lot earlier.”

-Oprah Winfrey.

Dear young person,

It isn’t right to make the foundation of your life to be false to attract friendship. Lots of what some of you do are to paint a wack picture and situate it with the interest to lure your victim into your life. Knowing how this can collapse someday, it is very risky to think of such an act, let alone convincing people with your consistent emotional bait.

Any structure that has little or no good plan, will eventually fall, no matter how long the building is sustained with paints and decorations. Just like a foundation placed on sandy soil will one day degenerate and be washed out smoothly by the flood, so does the application of fake life wears off, any moment they outlive their standard. Perhaps, you may keep thinking that while it lasts, you will get hold of another person, but it doesn’t guarantee you the beauty you ought to enjoy while living in that grief you call friendship.

Any structure that has little or no good plan, will eventually fall, no matter how long the building is sustained with paints and decorations. Just like a foundation placed on sandy soil will one day degenerate and be washed out smoothly by the flood, so does the application of fake life wears off, any moment they outlive their standard. Perhaps, you may keep thinking that while it lasts, you will get hold of another person, but it doesn’t guarantee you the beauty you ought to enjoy while living in that grief you call friendship.

Love is a rare feeling. It is because many individuals have begun nurturing love from the angle between lies and deceit. The natural resources sandwiched in love, keep deteriorating with the acceptance that love can only be found when two persons pretend to be what they are not. What love characterises is nothing but a value built in openness to the other. Once this point is defeated, the message that goes with it – love, is tortured and it is influenced by the toxic chemicals that come with fatal practice of insincerity.

People who are chiefly students to lies, are caged. They are not free, neither do they have liberty of expression. Anytime they are compelled to live their real life, another sector of their life, which they contracted out of pettiness, will halt them. Such an emotional regulation, can cause a total psychological damage. The more you employ different lives to please people, the faster you grow into less. Even though lies, as some of you think, activate quicker than real life, but the destruction is costlier than the benefits you could ever enjoy. As far as love is concerned, there is no more means to embrace it if not to allow your mind gum with whoever that would appreciate your other life that you shelter in the little box of pretence.

It doesn’t cost anything to maintain love. But you see the maintenance of faux life? It is always expensive. Take for example, a lady who has a scar on her left cheek and decides to cover it with cosmetics. Ordinarily, the quantity of what he would take to burry that mark on her cheek will be multiplied into three in order to arrive at this success. If she had allowed that scar and begin to adore it as a mark that defines beauty, she wouldn’t spend her energy, time and resources in constructing a mountain of horeb to please her admirers.

“You attract the right things when you have a sense of who you are.”

-Amy Poehler.

Don’t rate your pretentious life above your life lived without being answerable to anyone about your shortcomings. A man who has no car, doesn’t need to borrow one to go for a date. A lady who has no designers’ bag, doesn’t need to crave for one, before she goes to meet her boyfriend. It is appalling to see people fall for these things, as if they are constituents of love and friendship. And it is even more stunning when some young minds have such a discussion and are prone to yielding to the promptings of hypocrisy.

Stop adapting easily to emotional fuss. There is no gain saying that they are mini-way of achieving your own happiness. It is impossible to have happiness while venturing into an unproductive business. The sorrow that consumes your soul, anytime you understand how you are losing, will make you realize that all these while, you have been making a grave mistake that will take a lot of time to repair.

Discover your life. It is not a credit to you that you are dwelling in characters that are different from what your natural life is. Stop reducing yourself into pains, always making up various ways to keep your fake life, whereas you can live your life without stress and being able to collaborate with real people. One thing fake life does to your love life; it downplays your capability to break more boundaries of opportunities. It makes you think you are lowly and there is nothing more you can do outside the poorly ventilated attitudes you exhibit. A very famous quote from an African Linguist opines that “a fake life is like a flat tyre, you would go nowhere, except at a time it is changed”. You’d go everywhere with ease once you dissolve your pretentious lifestyle.

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